ESPY awards commentary

So by now we are all aware of my love of awards shows. And my love of sports. And my love of NSYNC. What better way to celebrate such things than to watch the ESPY awards and share my thoughts with you. Get. Excited.

I'm already loving this because the images are giving me the chills. And my apartnemt is hot as balls. AWESOME.

So the Brett Favre retirement videos... don't you think they should have changed it since he's most likely coming back now? Nnot that I mind... cuase he's hot... but still.

AND JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE COMES OUT TO THE 90s CHICAGO BULLS ENTRANCE MUSIC... amazing!!!!!!

Oh Patriots zing... pretty lame. But the Kobe-Shaq double zing was respectable. HAHAHAHAHA mocking Eli for being lame and finally seeing a woman naked = awesome. Justin may have been flirting with David Beckham. I think I might be a bit turned on.

First award. Danica Patrick presents. Her hair looks like shit. Best upset award - if it ISN'T Appalachian State... I hate everyone. OK... the NY Giants win for the Super Bowl. Obviously the best Super Bowl I have ever witnessed, but compared to App State, it wouldn't be the same unless like the CFL beat the Patriots. Or a Pop Warner team. And if I hated the Patriots nearly as much as I hate Michigan. D bags.

So Favre is making jokes about coming back. I'm starting to genuinely feel bad for Aaron Rodgers... even though he's in no way as hot as Favre.

Oh god. JT is about to sing a song with Greg Oden on piano. Damn you Buckeyes... but this has potential to be ridiculous. The song is obviously inappropriately cheesy... then he strips down and goes all Billy Crystal and sings about what happens... OH HOCKEY REFERENCE! And he mocks Jessica Simpson. AGAIN. Not as good asw the SNL edition... but awesome. Referencing Janet Jackson's boob. This is really lame. I'm bored.

OK WHY IS TOM CRUISE NARRATING THE TOMMIE SMITH JOHN CARLOS BLACK POWER SALUTE MONTAGE? Other than Michael Richards, I really can't think of anything more ridiculous. Big ups to the Forrest Gump theme as soundtrack... I approve.

Tyree's Lord and Savior Jesus Christ won the SuperBowl. Obvi.

OK I'm giving up on this live blog. It is lame. WAIT DAVID BECKHAM IS TALKING!!!!! OK I'm bored again. Later.

UPDATE: I definitely started to cry when Kevin Everett came on stage to accept the Jimmy V award of perseverence... Wow... I know I say it a lot... but that guy actually for real pisses intensity. No lie. Big ups. I am inspired. What a champ.