Bachelor Blog - HOMETOWN DATES

Sorry for all the delay on Bachelor Blogs. Here's one (out of order)... from 2 episodes ago. DJ Victorious is not present in this one, so it's not as in depth (or sexxxxxxxxxy... rarr)...

So this is the hometown date episode, where we all get to find out how CRAZY all these girls' families are... and what they'll look like when they get older. Mom... grandma... yeesh.

blnd44illini (10:02:16 PM): the lack of your niece online right now is very disappointing
Jeflow1 (10:02:45 PM): Hmmm...where is she?

First up, Phoenix Suns dancer, Jenni from Wichita
We get to see Brad getting ready for the date:

blnd44illini (10:04:28 PM): ah gratuitous shower scene
blnd44illini (10:04:33 PM): not unnecessary at all

We see Jenni waiting for Brad

Jeflow1 (10:04:42 PM): Hey smiley
Jeflow1 (10:04:58 PM): Cheerleader clap!
blnd44illini (10:05:05 PM): she'sWAY too giddy
blnd44illini (10:05:13 PM): that wasn't even a good cheerleader clap
Jeflow1 (10:05:13 PM): Nice teeth...all 300 of them.
blnd44illini (10:05:18 PM): that was a whore cheerleader clap

Jenni performs her first on stage dance ever for Brad

blnd44illini (10:05:36 PM): dancing... on a pole
Jeflow1 (10:05:43 PM): laughs way too much.
Jeflow1 (10:05:53 PM): oh, the hand kisser too
Jeflow1 (10:06:06 PM): Hee, hee, hee, hee...puke!
Jeflow1 (10:06:16 PM): Are you kidding me?
Jeflow1 (10:06:32 PM): What is she hoping to get by doing this?
blnd44illini (10:06:41 PM): the lack of music is creeptastic

We finally meet the family. Grandma is, well, INDESCRIBABLE. Mostly because we can't understand what she's saying. It's like drunken stroke victim from the deep south. OUCH.

Jeflow1 (10:08:14 PM): Gremlin Grandma
blnd44illini (10:08:20 PM): YESSSS creepy grandparents
blnd44illini (10:08:28 PM): they're my faves
Jeflow1 (10:08:23 PM): Nice eye makeup
Jeflow1 (10:12:15 PM): I think she's excited.
blnd44illini (10:12:33 PM): that's so unlike her
Jeflow1 (10:12:31 PM): OK...not diggin the baby talk
blnd44illini (10:12:42 PM): hand kiss AGAIN
Jeflow1 (10:13:10 PM): Grandma looks like a smoker
blnd44illini (10:13:31 PM): and a scotch drinker
blnd44illini (10:13:37 PM): and by drinker i mean drunk right now
Jeflow1 (10:13:39 PM): Does she speak English?
blnd44illini (10:14:10 PM): GRANDMA just said walking baby factory

Jenni's mom washes Brad's hair for 1 on 1 time:

Jeflow1 (10:14:34 PM): OK...her breasts are in his face.
Jeflow1 (10:14:43 PM): I think Mom has it for him.
Jeflow1 (10:14:52 PM): Mom has dirty elbows
blnd44illini (10:15:17 PM): ummmmmmm you know how they say you should look at the mom and grandma to see what daughter will look like when she gets old?
blnd44illini (10:15:27 PM): brad should be pretty scared
Jeflow1 (10:15:26 PM): Exactly
blnd44illini (10:15:33 PM): i bet she can keep him REAL busy
Jeflow1 (10:16:18 PM): Nice...Dad making him feel real comfortable
Jeflow1 (10:16:50 PM): Dad's a drinker too
Jeflow1 (10:17:07 PM): Baby talk, baby talk.
Jeflow1 (10:17:12 PM): Smiley
Jeflow1 (10:17:30 PM): Third hand kiss is a charm
blnd44illini (10:18:42 PM): god w/ the crying
blnd44illini (10:18:49 PM): he's such a sucker for the crying
Jeflow1 (10:19:20 PM): It seems like she's in the lead...there's got to be something wrong with her.

Now we head to Sheena's house. Mom is putting on the ridiculous pressure.

Jeflow1 (10:24:16 PM): dad dyes his hair
blnd44illini (10:25:03 PM): i think he uses the same color as the mom
blnd44illini (10:25:09 PM): did her mom just ask his sign?
blnd44illini (10:25:17 PM): is this a seventies porno?
Jeflow1 (10:25:55 PM): bev wants him
blnd44illini (10:26:02 PM): Mom seems to want to make out w/ him
blnd44illini (10:26:19 PM): too creepy about the signs - i think she's high
blnd44illini (10:27:26 PM): ummmmmmmmmmmm
blnd44illini (10:27:36 PM): i am uncomfortable watching this
blnd44illini (10:27:48 PM): i think mom might be the deal breaker
blnd44illini (10:28:12 PM): she obviously never read "The Rules"
Jeflow1 (10:28:24 PM): mom will join them in the jacuzzi
blnd44illini (10:29:01 PM): "oh brad, i forgot my swimsuit... but the stars align"

Now we head to Deanna's house

blnd44illini (10:35:37 PM): i enjoy this dad
blnd44illini (10:35:44 PM): he seems less like a pedophile

Grandma and Grandpa arrive... and break out the... SHOTS? NICE!

Jeflow1 (10:37:58 PM): let the party begin
blnd44illini (10:38:30 PM): grandpa and grandma GET AFTER IT
Jeflow1 (10:39:19 PM): wow
Jeflow1 (10:39:34 PM): we may have a winner

Now to Bettina the divorcee's house.

Jeflow1 (10:40:17 PM): wow her dad is stephen king
blnd44illini (10:42:08 PM): at least we know she has money?
blnd44illini (10:42:16 PM): and will probably kill him in his sleep
Jeflow1 (10:43:05 PM): silly girl
blnd44illini (10:44:22 PM): dad's hair is ridiculous
blnd44illini (10:46:01 PM): mom's a bitch
Jeflow1 (10:46:40 PM): hag
blnd44illini (10:46:48 PM): ewwwwwwww auntie is not cute
Jeflow1 (10:47:31 PM): ease up spock
blnd44illini (10:48:17 PM): this is why you should never date someone who has little dogs
Jeflow1 (10:48:45 PM): only stephen king would name his dog scary

Basically Bettina's family treated brad like COMPLETE garbage. When he called her out on it... She's like "whatever I don't look good on paper either." Brad gets pissed, Bettina shoves her foot farther and farther into her mouth by insulting Brad to... alleviate the tension?....

blnd44illini (10:49:31 PM): punch her brad
blnd44illini (10:49:31 PM): do it
Jeflow1 (10:49:56 PM): bettini we hardly knew ya
blnd44illini (10:50:48 PM): yeah peace out
blnd44illini (10:51:01 PM): i've never felt so confident in a "not getting a rose" pick
Jeflow1 (10:52:36 PM): and she has awful hair

ROSE CEREMONY

Jeflow1 (10:52:56 PM): can deanna steal one of jenny's smiles
Jeflow1 (10:53:59 PM): can bettina be saved by sheena's mom?????
blnd44illini (10:54:11 PM): i don't know
blnd44illini (10:54:14 PM): crazy vs. bitch
blnd44illini (10:54:18 PM): the ultimate battle

Sooooo Bettina gets a rose and Sheena is sent home.

blnd44illini (10:54:21 PM): WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT
blnd44illini (10:54:25 PM): NO WAY
blnd44illini (10:54:26 PM): NO WAY
blnd44illini (10:54:38 PM): that is RIDICULOUS
Jeflow1 (10:54:35 PM): sheena's mom was the deal breaker
blnd44illini (10:54:51 PM): wow
blnd44illini (10:55:01 PM): i know she was crazy
blnd44illini (10:55:05 PM): but still
Jeflow1 (10:55:01 PM): that's some shit there

Brad goes to talk to Sheena, who seemed to take the rejection remarkably well, at first...

blnd44illini (10:55:41 PM): "let's be friends"
blnd44illini (10:55:58 PM): i thought i was going to respect her for keeping the tears in
blnd44illini (10:56:02 PM): but i was clearly wrong
Jeflow1 (10:56:16 PM): it's not you it's me
blnd44illini (10:56:45 PM): don't lie about the chemistry - its that her mom is bat shit crazy
Jeflow1 (10:57:20 PM): B-rad is that guy

Jeflow1 (11:00:00 PM): goodnight...DJ VICTORIOUS missed some good shit