The bachelor can tell a lot by a woman by how much she bets. Yeah that’s great. Take girls who know you’re loaded and want to marry you and get them started gambling earlier. Awesome idea.
Girl falls down the stairs. I hope she was drunk. Otherwise it’s not funny or amusing. It is Michelle from New Jersey. So ugly and bad balance. Not good. Wow I’m a not nice person. She can’t go on the first date. I smell a Bevin.
I love that in a commercial preview they have a shot of Solisa (preseason whore) from the back, right after she takes off her swim suit. AND she has a tramp stamp. Of course. Even better, as they’re showing this, you hear her say – "I’m a Christian and I usually stick to my morals." OBVIOUSLY.
McCarten makes moves for the 1st kiss. HAHAHAHAH the bachelor just said “I can’t lie, it wasn’t good”…. Then he wipes it off. So apparently bad call on the preseason MVP.
Early rose to DeAnna. She busts out the “my 5 year boyfriend cheated on me.” Yet another addition to the preseason sob story. Girls go to bust up a possible kiss. I agree on this part. Reality love shows wouldn’t be anything w/out cockblocking.
For the beach date, Brad shows up in a wooden beach car. WAY better than the DeLorian. This guy could emasculate Andy from last season just by looking at him. The girls are trying way to hard to get his shirt off. It’s a little rape like. As is Solisa (whore) making him do a body shot. During the day. Not at a bar. Immediately before she tells him she’s a Christian w/ morals and strong values. Jesus loves body shots. It’s what he would do, of course. Off of fake boobs. Like Solisa’s. Who has a tramp stamp.
First official makeout goes to Jenni w/ the Phoenix Suns. DUH. Preseason MVP. But also kind of slutty. Whilst she’s making out, the other girls go through her stuff and find her modeling book. I’m now pegging her as a fantasy suite dater, who goes home after meeting the family. I now am really enjoying Sarah the happy girl - prediction: ending up at least in the final 2.
Bettina is divorced-girl. At least she’s cuter than Bevin. And got too scared to tell him. Whore who got in the pool on the first day basically demands him to make her breakfast in bed, and not have her have to work. Clearly golddigger award goes to this chick. Girl with the bad bangs (Jade) tries to jeopardize the other girls. Everyone is going to hate her I bet, but I see her going far in the competition. Remember Lacey from Rock of Love?
Brad just said "understatement". I think that is more syllables than Andy was able to say all season last year. Suffice it to say, no wonder Andy and Tessa are no longer together. She’s too smart for him.
AND girl who falls down the stairs does not get a rose. I want to say Brad is a dick for this, but I have to agree. Pool whore doesn’t get one either. Good.
The sluttiness factor on this Bachelor may be unprecedented… and previews say the Full House twin switch makes an appearance this week. Get excited.
Showing posts with label Delorian. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Delorian. Show all posts
Monday, October 8, 2007
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
Bachelor LIVE aim chat - April 23
Yes, Smurftastic blatantly stole this idea from Kissing Suzy Kolber... but they are much funnier than us... kissmesuzy.blogspot.com SO ENJOY!!
Chris Harrison previews the episode:
blnd44illini (9:31:20 PM): humanitarian... and D bag... and he's looking for love
DJvictoriousT (9:31:51 PM): tessa!
DJvictoriousT (9:32:38 PM): please - the most spectacular date in Bachelor history?
blnd44illini (9:33:21 PM): they are going to run out of spectacular dates; one time they should just send them to a movie and the other group like to Paris and see what the movie bitches think
Our Bachelor drives up in his $500,000 car to pick up the ladies to go to Tahoe for the weekend:
DJvictoriousT (9:34:53 PM): oh the car
DJvictoriousT (9:34:57 PM): douchebag
blnd44illini (9:36:14 PM): he's sending them back to the future
DJvictoriousT (9:36:17 PM): dancing like liquid in the limo!
Time to get ready for the first date. Bevin starts to cry because she feels like she is missing out since she hurt her ankle during boot camp last week. Makes all the others late for their date because they’re helping her get ready.
DJvictoriousT (9:40:34 PM): i thought they said no date box
DJvictoriousT (9:40:36 PM): liars
blnd44illini (9:40:41 PM): no date box in LA
(would like to interject here about the semi dirty connotations of the word “date box”)
blnd44illini (9:40:48 PM): chris is a lying sack of shit…and he needs more to do
blnd44illini (9:41:22 PM): well you aren't going to get ready any faster if you make your eyes swell up... dumb whore
DJvictoriousT (9:41:26 PM): it is SO HARD to be given an all expensives paid trip to Tahoe
blnd44illini (9:41:33 PM): god crutches
blnd44illini (9:41:38 PM): has heather mills taught us nothing?
blnd44illini (9:42:29 PM): if i was doing her makeup i would have given her raccoon eyes
During date, Andy strikes up a conversation about the most romantic locations in the world, some ridiculous answers, then Bevin starts to be whiny to get alone time w/ Andy and the other girls get jealous
blnd44illini (9:42:53 PM): CABO?
DJvictoriousT (9:43:05 PM): she must have watched Laguna
blnd44illini (9:43:04 PM): Romantic if you are topless and wasted on spring break
blnd44illini (9:43:16 PM): she left the brace
blnd44illini (9:43:20 PM): whore
DJvictoriousT (9:43:24 PM): This is a pathetic move for Andy-time
blnd44illini (9:43:51 PM): she shouldn't feel insecure for not being able to do fun things
blnd44illini (9:44:02 PM): she should feel insecure because she's not 28, she's actually 40
DJvictoriousT (9:45:16 PM): electricity? Andy - sorry line
blnd44illini (9:46:29 PM): i think Andy just made out w/ his mom
DJvictoriousT (9:47:08 PM): that shot of the woman reinforced the information i got that they do their own "styling"
Regarding our overall opinions of the Bachelor:
DJvictoriousT (9:42:24 PM): God. He is so...simple - Special thanks to DJ Victorious' neighbor for that one...
blnd44illini (9:52:23 PM): he is less articulate that George W.
Later on at the casino…
DJvictoriousT (9:53:35 PM): Andy has a kind of creepy upper arm grab/rub
blnd44illini (9:53:48 PM): he's got some excellent makeout attempts when the girl doesn't want to
blnd44illini (9:53:55 PM): he should talk to schewe about the lean in
blnd44illini (9:54:00 PM): it could be very effective for him
DJvictoriousT (9:54:35 PM): danielle is making moves
DJvictoriousT (9:54:59 PM): she might be a drag queen
blnd44illini (9:55:15 PM): oh i see an adams apple when they makeout
DJvictoriousT (9:55:20 PM): whoa! danielle. strong move
blnd44illini (9:55:37 PM): she so far is setting the slutty bar for the evening
Andy picks Bevin for special alone time back in his suite. They have the “I’m such a nerd” talk that all attractive people have when they date on television. Lots of making out (gross cause she’s old) and a bit of straddling him. Walking back to the women’s suite, Andy tells her she is his sanctuary.
DJvictoriousT (10:02:42 PM): bevin. pathetic. moving to hawaii for a man who drives a Delorian
blnd44illini (10:02:54 PM): well she started dating when they were big
blnd44illini (10:02:59 PM): it makes her feel young
blnd44illini (10:11:01 PM): because of Andy, i have added a new item to the list of things men I date are not allowed to do
blnd44illini (10:11:20 PM): they may not call me "their sanctuary" when there is no chance of getting some
DJvictoriousT (10:13:54 PM): um. i'm bored. where's the alcohol? where' s the sex?
Second date: Andy rejects Fake Boobs for special alone time, even though its her birthday
blnd44illini (10:19:47 PM): i think Tina sold me a purse on Canal Street on Saturday
DJvictoriousT (10:21:48 PM): Tina's a contender and she's "doing a great job". A great job doing what?.....
DJvictoriousT (10:21:54 PM): What "job"?
blnd44illini (10:22:12 PM): oh YOU KNOW what job
DJvictoriousT (10:22:26 PM): No - maybe you should draw me a picture
DJvictoriousT (10:24:28 PM): Tina doesn't want to get involved in the drama. Tina also doesn't have any friends and sings the National Anthem to impress guys
blnd44illini (10:24:49 PM): well Andy doesn't understand drama and tears up when girls sing the national anthem
blnd44illini (10:25:04 PM): and drives a delorian to impress chicks
Time for the one on one date, with Amber (who kind of looks like a bug who tanned to much in the past week)
DJvictoriousT (10:30:20 PM): Fondue?
DJvictoriousT (10:30:57 PM): Andy's a slut. Kissing multiple girls?! Disgusting.
DJvictoriousT (10:31:04 PM): How dare he
blnd44illini (10:31:07 PM): the nerve
blnd44illini (10:31:09 PM): Jesus hates him
DJvictoriousT (10:32:40 PM): Cue the porn music
blnd44illini (10:33:05 PM): premarital sex is NOT what dating shows are about
DJvictoriousT (10:33:36 PM): Is he taking his bathing suit off?
blnd44illini (10:33:45 PM): not yet
DJvictoriousT (10:33:49 PM): Oh. no. just a rose.
DJvictoriousT (10:34:29 PM): Wait. Andy. Is that another rose udner the water?
blnd44illini (10:34:58 PM): why don't you dive down and check?
Quick break for one of the most disgusting commercials ever created…
blnd44illini (10:35:24 PM): INTRIGUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
blnd44illini (10:35:56 PM): KY, for the love of your life... or some dude you met on a dating show who railed your roommate last night. Whatever.
Time for the elimination cocktail party! Fake Boobs wearing a stripper dress, other chicks trying to win Andy’s heart. We are still not sure why he is worth it.
blnd44illini (10:48:24 PM): i'm a bit worried about Tessa's chances
DJvictoriousT (10:48:32 PM): me too
DJvictoriousT (10:48:36 PM): she's too cool for this
blnd44illini (10:49:01 PM): but doesn't he have to keep at least 1 sane person?
blnd44illini (10:49:04 PM): that should be in the contract
blnd44illini (10:51:10 PM): its times like this I miss the virgin with the overexcitable eyebrow raise
Tessa (preseason MVP) gets a rose, Fake Boobs does not.
DJvictoriousT (10:52:49 PM): Hooray!
blnd44illini (10:53:19 PM): danielle's new nickname - Adam's Apple
blnd44illini (10:53:56 PM): Tina's nickname = Bunny Face
blnd44illini (10:54:18 PM): she does a good "job"
blnd44illini (10:54:43 PM): difficult to see why... w/ those teeth
DJvictoriousT (10:57:36 PM): Tina's mouth looks a little small for her "job" performance to have gotten her a rose
blnd44illini (10:59:02 PM): this was a pretty boring episode
DJvictoriousT (10:59:13 PM): indeed
blnd44illini (10:59:31 PM): next week, someone better get knocked up
blnd44illini (10:59:42 PM): hopefully in the backseat of a delorian
DJvictoriousT (10:59:53 PM): we can only hope
DJvictoriousT (11:00:37 PM): i hope the inferno was good
OK so for the first bachelor live IM chat, the show wasn’t throwing us any bones and having something entertaining happening. We’ll try again next week.
Chris Harrison previews the episode:
blnd44illini (9:31:20 PM): humanitarian... and D bag... and he's looking for love
DJvictoriousT (9:31:51 PM): tessa!
DJvictoriousT (9:32:38 PM): please - the most spectacular date in Bachelor history?
blnd44illini (9:33:21 PM): they are going to run out of spectacular dates; one time they should just send them to a movie and the other group like to Paris and see what the movie bitches think
Our Bachelor drives up in his $500,000 car to pick up the ladies to go to Tahoe for the weekend:
DJvictoriousT (9:34:53 PM): oh the car
DJvictoriousT (9:34:57 PM): douchebag
blnd44illini (9:36:14 PM): he's sending them back to the future
DJvictoriousT (9:36:17 PM): dancing like liquid in the limo!
Time to get ready for the first date. Bevin starts to cry because she feels like she is missing out since she hurt her ankle during boot camp last week. Makes all the others late for their date because they’re helping her get ready.
DJvictoriousT (9:40:34 PM): i thought they said no date box
DJvictoriousT (9:40:36 PM): liars
blnd44illini (9:40:41 PM): no date box in LA
(would like to interject here about the semi dirty connotations of the word “date box”)
blnd44illini (9:40:48 PM): chris is a lying sack of shit…and he needs more to do
blnd44illini (9:41:22 PM): well you aren't going to get ready any faster if you make your eyes swell up... dumb whore
DJvictoriousT (9:41:26 PM): it is SO HARD to be given an all expensives paid trip to Tahoe
blnd44illini (9:41:33 PM): god crutches
blnd44illini (9:41:38 PM): has heather mills taught us nothing?
blnd44illini (9:42:29 PM): if i was doing her makeup i would have given her raccoon eyes
During date, Andy strikes up a conversation about the most romantic locations in the world, some ridiculous answers, then Bevin starts to be whiny to get alone time w/ Andy and the other girls get jealous
blnd44illini (9:42:53 PM): CABO?
DJvictoriousT (9:43:05 PM): she must have watched Laguna
blnd44illini (9:43:04 PM): Romantic if you are topless and wasted on spring break
blnd44illini (9:43:16 PM): she left the brace
blnd44illini (9:43:20 PM): whore
DJvictoriousT (9:43:24 PM): This is a pathetic move for Andy-time
blnd44illini (9:43:51 PM): she shouldn't feel insecure for not being able to do fun things
blnd44illini (9:44:02 PM): she should feel insecure because she's not 28, she's actually 40
DJvictoriousT (9:45:16 PM): electricity? Andy - sorry line
blnd44illini (9:46:29 PM): i think Andy just made out w/ his mom
DJvictoriousT (9:47:08 PM): that shot of the woman reinforced the information i got that they do their own "styling"
Regarding our overall opinions of the Bachelor:
DJvictoriousT (9:42:24 PM): God. He is so...simple - Special thanks to DJ Victorious' neighbor for that one...
blnd44illini (9:52:23 PM): he is less articulate that George W.
Later on at the casino…
DJvictoriousT (9:53:35 PM): Andy has a kind of creepy upper arm grab/rub
blnd44illini (9:53:48 PM): he's got some excellent makeout attempts when the girl doesn't want to
blnd44illini (9:53:55 PM): he should talk to schewe about the lean in
blnd44illini (9:54:00 PM): it could be very effective for him
DJvictoriousT (9:54:35 PM): danielle is making moves
DJvictoriousT (9:54:59 PM): she might be a drag queen
blnd44illini (9:55:15 PM): oh i see an adams apple when they makeout
DJvictoriousT (9:55:20 PM): whoa! danielle. strong move
blnd44illini (9:55:37 PM): she so far is setting the slutty bar for the evening
Andy picks Bevin for special alone time back in his suite. They have the “I’m such a nerd” talk that all attractive people have when they date on television. Lots of making out (gross cause she’s old) and a bit of straddling him. Walking back to the women’s suite, Andy tells her she is his sanctuary.
DJvictoriousT (10:02:42 PM): bevin. pathetic. moving to hawaii for a man who drives a Delorian
blnd44illini (10:02:54 PM): well she started dating when they were big
blnd44illini (10:02:59 PM): it makes her feel young
blnd44illini (10:11:01 PM): because of Andy, i have added a new item to the list of things men I date are not allowed to do
blnd44illini (10:11:20 PM): they may not call me "their sanctuary" when there is no chance of getting some
DJvictoriousT (10:13:54 PM): um. i'm bored. where's the alcohol? where' s the sex?
Second date: Andy rejects Fake Boobs for special alone time, even though its her birthday
blnd44illini (10:19:47 PM): i think Tina sold me a purse on Canal Street on Saturday
DJvictoriousT (10:21:48 PM): Tina's a contender and she's "doing a great job". A great job doing what?.....
DJvictoriousT (10:21:54 PM): What "job"?
blnd44illini (10:22:12 PM): oh YOU KNOW what job
DJvictoriousT (10:22:26 PM): No - maybe you should draw me a picture
DJvictoriousT (10:24:28 PM): Tina doesn't want to get involved in the drama. Tina also doesn't have any friends and sings the National Anthem to impress guys
blnd44illini (10:24:49 PM): well Andy doesn't understand drama and tears up when girls sing the national anthem
blnd44illini (10:25:04 PM): and drives a delorian to impress chicks
Time for the one on one date, with Amber (who kind of looks like a bug who tanned to much in the past week)
DJvictoriousT (10:30:20 PM): Fondue?
DJvictoriousT (10:30:57 PM): Andy's a slut. Kissing multiple girls?! Disgusting.
DJvictoriousT (10:31:04 PM): How dare he
blnd44illini (10:31:07 PM): the nerve
blnd44illini (10:31:09 PM): Jesus hates him
DJvictoriousT (10:32:40 PM): Cue the porn music
blnd44illini (10:33:05 PM): premarital sex is NOT what dating shows are about
DJvictoriousT (10:33:36 PM): Is he taking his bathing suit off?
blnd44illini (10:33:45 PM): not yet
DJvictoriousT (10:33:49 PM): Oh. no. just a rose.
DJvictoriousT (10:34:29 PM): Wait. Andy. Is that another rose udner the water?
blnd44illini (10:34:58 PM): why don't you dive down and check?
Quick break for one of the most disgusting commercials ever created…
blnd44illini (10:35:24 PM): INTRIGUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
blnd44illini (10:35:56 PM): KY, for the love of your life... or some dude you met on a dating show who railed your roommate last night. Whatever.
Time for the elimination cocktail party! Fake Boobs wearing a stripper dress, other chicks trying to win Andy’s heart. We are still not sure why he is worth it.
blnd44illini (10:48:24 PM): i'm a bit worried about Tessa's chances
DJvictoriousT (10:48:32 PM): me too
DJvictoriousT (10:48:36 PM): she's too cool for this
blnd44illini (10:49:01 PM): but doesn't he have to keep at least 1 sane person?
blnd44illini (10:49:04 PM): that should be in the contract
blnd44illini (10:51:10 PM): its times like this I miss the virgin with the overexcitable eyebrow raise
Tessa (preseason MVP) gets a rose, Fake Boobs does not.
DJvictoriousT (10:52:49 PM): Hooray!
blnd44illini (10:53:19 PM): danielle's new nickname - Adam's Apple
blnd44illini (10:53:56 PM): Tina's nickname = Bunny Face
blnd44illini (10:54:18 PM): she does a good "job"
blnd44illini (10:54:43 PM): difficult to see why... w/ those teeth
DJvictoriousT (10:57:36 PM): Tina's mouth looks a little small for her "job" performance to have gotten her a rose
blnd44illini (10:59:02 PM): this was a pretty boring episode
DJvictoriousT (10:59:13 PM): indeed
blnd44illini (10:59:31 PM): next week, someone better get knocked up
blnd44illini (10:59:42 PM): hopefully in the backseat of a delorian
DJvictoriousT (10:59:53 PM): we can only hope
DJvictoriousT (11:00:37 PM): i hope the inferno was good
OK so for the first bachelor live IM chat, the show wasn’t throwing us any bones and having something entertaining happening. We’ll try again next week.
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